If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
