I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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