There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Randomize
