operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
