I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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