Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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