garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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