so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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