I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
