Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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