It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize