O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
