Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
