Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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