After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize