She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
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