i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
