it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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