Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Randomize
