I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
