I feel like I'm in dance class right now
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
