The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
