let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
