Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
