Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
