you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
