They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
