you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
