u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
