Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Randomize
