Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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