is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
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