What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
