She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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