She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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