i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
