doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
