when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
