Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Randomize
