He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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