We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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