found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
