i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
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