matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
soo... how was my night?
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
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