Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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