I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Randomize
