Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
