well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
two words: eviction party
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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