try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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