Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
