I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize
